So it's JUNE! First grade wooot! Um. Well, sort of?
Still drowning in the interwebs and curriculum review, I realized that since it doesn't matter at all when we start "first" grade, that I may as well start adding in things now one at a time. This way, I can get used to all the new things and how they'll flow into our day without overwhelming myself. The kids want to be outside as much as possible, so while we're still doing school everyday, I'm giving in, keeping it light, and letting them enjoy the days swimming and getting messy. As fall approaches, I can set up a more concrete schedule.
The first thing I added was First Language Lessons. This is wonderful! It's so short, just having a conversation with her, and she's memorizing poems and parts of speech with ease. We're about 15 lessons in, and I plan to do it 2-3 times per week so we stretch level 1 out for the entire year. We just started with Elemental Science, and I bought the workbook to go with it, which I regret. It's just too much writing for her at this stage, so I'm going to shelve it for this unit. The outlines for study though are great and we are doing the plant study unit first since it's appropriate given the weather. We've done one lesson in Telling God's Story and I like it fine too. We'll just do it Sunday mornings, and have a memory verse to go with it that we'll talk about every day. I'm not all that impressed with the activity book so far, so while I'll continue the series, we'll make up our own fun. Gabster begged to learn cursive, so I'm throwing that in too. I'm also still looking for a Spanish program (thinking Salsa online) as we're now attending a Spanish church service weekly and I just really want us all to be fluent anyway. We did our first history lessons this week and so far so good! She is so excited to talk about mummies and Ancient Egypt with Story of the World.
The best thing though, has been All About Spelling. Totally shocked at this, but I've realized that the "spell to read" approach is working beautifully. I finally see progression and she does not dread anything having to do with letters now. I dictate words, she spells them, reads them back at the end, and we follow it up with a BOB book or some other easy reader. Teaching her the spelling rules, will help her figure out new words as she comes across them. I've been reading about the Spalding method and it makes so much sense at least for her. I'll keep it in mind when it's Lil Bit's turn to read. Progress is still slow, but I have to remind myself that she just finished K and it's very normal for students not to be independently reading yet. If we're still stuck in CVC land come next summer, I'll worry then.
Speaking of Lil Bit, she's going to need some help with her language. We had her evaluated and she's presenting in the range of an 18 month old in some areas. She is four. She qualifies for speech and language therapy through the county in a preschool setting. That will be 4 days a week for her (half day), so I will not be doing anything else structured with her aside from reading, as she'll be plenty tired! This completely changes my day, as I am now looking at setting up a "morning time" for us since we're all together (memory work, history/science, Spanish) and doing Gabster's core math and reading work in the afternoon when little sister is gone and baby brother is napping. She is so excited to go, and I'm happy she'll be getting that time to have fun on her own and get the help she needs. Just one year should do it, and she'll be home for K.
Back to Gabster, math is going well. It's been really hard not to jump ship and try a different program, but she really is understanding concepts. We're spending the next 6 weeks just focusing on math facts with games and workbooks Addition Adventures & Subtraction Secrets. That way, moving to the next level should be a breeze.
So yes, we've started everything for first grade, but I'm still very much in summer mode so we'll call it official in August. We found a GREAT coop and that will be Tuesdays. We'll do music and native American unit studies this fall and I believe art & NC history in the spring.
I'm still certain that this was the best decision I've ever made for my children.
Thursday, June 5, 2014
Thursday, April 17, 2014
Planning, Planning, Planning... A Revelation
Now that we've moved and gotten settled, I'm knee-deep in planning mode. We will be officially starting 1st grade and PreK in June. I've been all over Pinterest and blog after blog reading curriculum reviews. 1st grade is serious business, still fun, but more serious. I can clearly see my big girl is ready for more, so more is what we'll do. I've immersed myself in theory, reading The Well Trained Mind (and loving it), Charlotte Mason Companion and Cathy Duffy's 101 Top Homeschool Picks. Surely with all this reading, I'd find *the* one that would encompass everything.
I did not. Bummer.
It occurred to me though, while reading Duffy's book, that I had been going about this completely backwards. Rather than finding a program in a box that would tell me exactly what to do and when (because who doesn't like that reassurance that you're doing all that you have to do when it comes to educating your children?), I should have been telling the program what to do! I am in control, the true beauty of homeschool, so I set about thinking on what I wanted this year to mean for us, keeping in mind what they love, and giving them access to new things.
I want them to love reading, focusing on Gabster especially as it's a struggle for her. I'm sending back All About Reading (they have a money back gaurantee!) as it is totally not helping her one bit. She finds is monotonous and boring, (rolls her eyes and sighs when I bring it out) with no use for the tiles as she's not a hands on learner. We can accomplish the same task with a basic pack of flash cards. Since she can sound out words well, all she needs to do is READ. I doubt I'll ever invest any more money in a full reading program. Perhaps she needs Level 2, but I previewed and honestly, it's the same things as this, just different words. For Lil Bit, since she knows her letters and sounds, we'll work on blends to hopefully have her on her way to reading by 5. I would like to add in biblical studies and history (my fave!). Lastly, I very much want to do science, and since my husband loves that, involve him so he can have special time with the kiddos. I want them to love learning, and become more self sufficient. Chores will be the big change for them, I hope that goes over well as we add more accountability and structure. They will each have one activity, I'm hoping piano for Gabster and I'm not sure what yet for LB. She likes dance, but I'm not sure she would miss going.
So here's what's on deck!
Gabster's 1st Grade Line Up - She enjoys me reading aloud quite a bit, so I've chosen things that would have me do that. It will be hard with baby brother underfoot, but we'll make due. Thankfully a lot of these have audiobooks to give my voice a break!
Math- Singapore 1B. We're just about finished with 1A so we'll continue. If it isn't broke, don't fix it! It has been great. I'm picking up the Intensive Practice books as well.
Reading/Language Arts- Aside from just continuing to read as much as we can, I may add First Language Lessons in the fall if she has progressed well. I think grammar is very important and worth starting early. She will do a lot of writing with the history and science curriculum, so anything extra will just be free writing of her choosing. I may add something like Spelling Workout in the fall as well to build vocabulary. My focus this summer is to get this girl to LOVE reading! Elephant and Piggie, here we come! I intend to read chapter books aloud. We're finishing up Charlotte's Web and I think Alice's Adventures in Wonderland is next.
History- Story of the World Vol 1 - We'll be studying Ancient Times, I'm so excited! This will be our first attempt at classical education featuring memory work.
Science- Elemental Science - I considered just winging it, but really, it's quite affordable and would save me a lot of time!
Bible Studies- Telling God's Story Year One. What I like most about this series, is that it begins with Jesus. The parables in my mind, seem like the perfect starting place for getting young learners to understand Christ.
We will NOT do all of this everyday. Math and reading are daily, science is on Fridays (catch that NPR fans?). History is Tues/Thurs and bible studies MWF. If we end up doing a coop this year, that'll change things up a bit, but I'm leaning toward waiting until LB is in kindergarten so they can go together and baby brother is older.
Lil Bit's PreK Line Up
Reading- Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons. I like the looks of this, and just a few minutes a day sounds perfect to get her blending sounds. No fancy tiles, white boards and flash cards.
That's it. Easy eh? She'll join in for history, science and bible studies. For math, I am focusing on one to one correspondence and counting up past 20. Simple conversations during play can accomplish this so I'm just going to have fun with her. I'd like to make her "all by myself" boxes I saw on this GREAT blog to keep her engaged while I do math/reading with big sister. I would like to keep the house media free (notwithstanding enriching computer programs) until after school is done (most likely after 3pm) especially for her. We'll work on writing her letters and improving her speech.
Phew, it's almost midnight so that's all for now. Once everything listed above arrives, it's time to plug things into my planner and start gathering supplemental books and supplies. I'll update at the six week mark to see if anything needs to be changed.
I did not. Bummer.
It occurred to me though, while reading Duffy's book, that I had been going about this completely backwards. Rather than finding a program in a box that would tell me exactly what to do and when (because who doesn't like that reassurance that you're doing all that you have to do when it comes to educating your children?), I should have been telling the program what to do! I am in control, the true beauty of homeschool, so I set about thinking on what I wanted this year to mean for us, keeping in mind what they love, and giving them access to new things.
I want them to love reading, focusing on Gabster especially as it's a struggle for her. I'm sending back All About Reading (they have a money back gaurantee!) as it is totally not helping her one bit. She finds is monotonous and boring, (rolls her eyes and sighs when I bring it out) with no use for the tiles as she's not a hands on learner. We can accomplish the same task with a basic pack of flash cards. Since she can sound out words well, all she needs to do is READ. I doubt I'll ever invest any more money in a full reading program. Perhaps she needs Level 2, but I previewed and honestly, it's the same things as this, just different words. For Lil Bit, since she knows her letters and sounds, we'll work on blends to hopefully have her on her way to reading by 5. I would like to add in biblical studies and history (my fave!). Lastly, I very much want to do science, and since my husband loves that, involve him so he can have special time with the kiddos. I want them to love learning, and become more self sufficient. Chores will be the big change for them, I hope that goes over well as we add more accountability and structure. They will each have one activity, I'm hoping piano for Gabster and I'm not sure what yet for LB. She likes dance, but I'm not sure she would miss going.
So here's what's on deck!
Gabster's 1st Grade Line Up - She enjoys me reading aloud quite a bit, so I've chosen things that would have me do that. It will be hard with baby brother underfoot, but we'll make due. Thankfully a lot of these have audiobooks to give my voice a break!
Math- Singapore 1B. We're just about finished with 1A so we'll continue. If it isn't broke, don't fix it! It has been great. I'm picking up the Intensive Practice books as well.
Reading/Language Arts- Aside from just continuing to read as much as we can, I may add First Language Lessons in the fall if she has progressed well. I think grammar is very important and worth starting early. She will do a lot of writing with the history and science curriculum, so anything extra will just be free writing of her choosing. I may add something like Spelling Workout in the fall as well to build vocabulary. My focus this summer is to get this girl to LOVE reading! Elephant and Piggie, here we come! I intend to read chapter books aloud. We're finishing up Charlotte's Web and I think Alice's Adventures in Wonderland is next.
History- Story of the World Vol 1 - We'll be studying Ancient Times, I'm so excited! This will be our first attempt at classical education featuring memory work.
Science- Elemental Science - I considered just winging it, but really, it's quite affordable and would save me a lot of time!
Bible Studies- Telling God's Story Year One. What I like most about this series, is that it begins with Jesus. The parables in my mind, seem like the perfect starting place for getting young learners to understand Christ.
We will NOT do all of this everyday. Math and reading are daily, science is on Fridays (catch that NPR fans?). History is Tues/Thurs and bible studies MWF. If we end up doing a coop this year, that'll change things up a bit, but I'm leaning toward waiting until LB is in kindergarten so they can go together and baby brother is older.
Lil Bit's PreK Line Up
Reading- Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons. I like the looks of this, and just a few minutes a day sounds perfect to get her blending sounds. No fancy tiles, white boards and flash cards.
That's it. Easy eh? She'll join in for history, science and bible studies. For math, I am focusing on one to one correspondence and counting up past 20. Simple conversations during play can accomplish this so I'm just going to have fun with her. I'd like to make her "all by myself" boxes I saw on this GREAT blog to keep her engaged while I do math/reading with big sister. I would like to keep the house media free (notwithstanding enriching computer programs) until after school is done (most likely after 3pm) especially for her. We'll work on writing her letters and improving her speech.
Phew, it's almost midnight so that's all for now. Once everything listed above arrives, it's time to plug things into my planner and start gathering supplemental books and supplies. I'll update at the six week mark to see if anything needs to be changed.
Saturday, April 5, 2014
Moving
So a lot has changed for our family...a LOT! We moved a few miles down the road to a new town and after 3 weeks we are slowly, very slowly, getting back into the groove of school. To be honest, I've felt quite terrible about it all. We spent the last half of February packing, the first half of March moving, and now we're into April and in the midst of unpacking. Weeks have gone by, and we've done only a few sit down lessons as outlined in my previous post. So much wasted time I've thought, what have I gotten myself into, she would have been doing SO much in school if she stayed.
Whoa.
She's 6.
Chill.
Ok. :)
Psst. She would have been on track out mostly anyway.
We have been reading everyday without fail. We play "I Spy" in the car, and add/subtract random things. We have focused on self help skills with nearly 4 year old LB especially. We have talked about our feelings as this is a big change and some days have been very hard for us all. Lots of tears over the smallest things has been the theme. "This house makes different sounds." "Where's my (fill in the blank)?" We've gone to the children's museums and parks almost every week just to get out and have fun. I actually think now it was a gift to her, this break, as I can only imagine how much more of a basket case she would be if she were in school everyday stressed to be the perfect student, and then coming home to a disheveled mess of a house with strange noises.
I decided that we will continue with this very casual approach, enjoying spring and getting messy in the garden, reading as much as we can, while I sit down and map out a plan for 1st grade. I hope to start in June.
Whoa.
She's 6.
Chill.
Ok. :)
Psst. She would have been on track out mostly anyway.
We have been reading everyday without fail. We play "I Spy" in the car, and add/subtract random things. We have focused on self help skills with nearly 4 year old LB especially. We have talked about our feelings as this is a big change and some days have been very hard for us all. Lots of tears over the smallest things has been the theme. "This house makes different sounds." "Where's my (fill in the blank)?" We've gone to the children's museums and parks almost every week just to get out and have fun. I actually think now it was a gift to her, this break, as I can only imagine how much more of a basket case she would be if she were in school everyday stressed to be the perfect student, and then coming home to a disheveled mess of a house with strange noises.
I decided that we will continue with this very casual approach, enjoying spring and getting messy in the garden, reading as much as we can, while I sit down and map out a plan for 1st grade. I hope to start in June.
Monday, February 3, 2014
"Still Alive!" (in my best Croods impression)
We're rolling into week 2 of our homeschool experiment and it will really be the first full week of mommy-led teaching in both reading and math. We had a bit of a hiccup with what I planned for reading, so we mainly just did math each day last week in addition to daily reading. We also had a couple of wonderful snow days, so rare in NC, of which we took full advantage.
Our day in a nutshell:
7:30- 8 Wakeup. The girls are responsible for making up their bed, brushing teeth and going potty before we go downstairs. Right now, they're waking me up, but I will start getting up at 6:30 or so to have some personal time. That is, if I can sneak out of bed without waking Eli, which hasn't really been possible yet. He is thoroughly attached to Mama.
8-9:30 Breakfast & Free Time - They will sometimes ask for a tv show so I'll oblige after they eat as I'm still waking up and need to clean up dishes. I would love to set up a kids dishwashing station to put them to work! It will be in our next house for sure. I'll usually feed the baby and putter around gathering up whatever stuff we need to get started.
10-11:30 Snack and reading: Right now we are using a mix of things as I see what works best. On deck we have All About Reading Level 1 for Gabster & Explode the Code. She loves doing workbooks, so that makes my life easy. She's a bit further along than level one in AAR, but the review is good and we're doing two lessons at a time. Towards the end it will all be new, so we'll do just one lesson a day. We alternate, so she does Explode the Code T/Th to reinforce. AAR is nice in that it involves some manipulation of letters with tiles. I can involve soon to be 4 Lil Bit nto the activities. I set her up with a dry erase board and she occupies herself practicing writing and pointing out letters she knows. She helps big sister with cutting and pasting too, so fun for all.
After AAR or ETC, we do Five in a Row. This is our try at unit studies. At first, I was underwhelmed. It's pitched to be an all encompassing curriculum, but it is absolutely not. It is a wonderful way to incorporate social studies and science for young learners though, using literature as the "spine" of the lessons. So again, this a great tool to involve Lili, while being able to ask Gabster lots of deeper questions to expand on things. We're starting with Katy in the Big Snow. It is a awesome book and chock full of things to draw from. I'm obsessed with Pinterest as there's so much out there. Tomorrow, we're drawing a big "map to Grandmas" imagining we're Katy, plowing through the snow unearthing all the buildings on the way. That will lead us into talking about community helpers, directions using a compass, addition with measuring snow, etc. So much fun! We'll spend 2 weeks per book.
12-12:30 Lunch
1 - 3 - Lil Bit takes a nap (thank God for that!), and Gabster and I do math. We are using Singapore Math for the main curriculum and it's a good fit so far. It is very easy for me as a teacher to direct and Gabster just loves math period so it's a breeze. We also use Life of Fred. It's a funny little series of a books that takes students all the way to calculus with the same character Fred. It doesn't offer enough practice in my opinion, but it's a nice change and brings math to real life situations. We do math for about 30 to 45 minutes depending on how much I have to stop with Eli. I'm thinking of adding in computer time at this point too, so a fun app or game that reinforces math.
3-5 Snack, free time and dinner prep - Gabster is spent at this point, so we're done! Lili is up and they go off for adventures. She usually does some art too and likes to write a story with what she draws, but it's really all whatever she wants to do.
It's working so well. I'm so happy. If we have to run out and do errands, we just pick up where we left off later. I love that this can really be done in whatever way we want. During all this time, Eli takes a nap in the Boba carrier, gets to play with food in the highchair and nurses on demand. He's cruising so I'm always keeping an eye out as he's super fast!
Oddly enough, my days seem to be easier? It's as if this has tripped my brain to be more focused on maximizing all my time so I can be fully present during lessons. Perhaps it's just what I've needed all along to really make staying at home work for me. I sort of fell into the stay at home mom role, and up until now I've always felt I needed to be "doing" something other than just managing the house and kids. This speaks to my inner geek, and I get so excited for the next day's activities. Life is good.
Our day in a nutshell:
7:30- 8 Wakeup. The girls are responsible for making up their bed, brushing teeth and going potty before we go downstairs. Right now, they're waking me up, but I will start getting up at 6:30 or so to have some personal time. That is, if I can sneak out of bed without waking Eli, which hasn't really been possible yet. He is thoroughly attached to Mama.
8-9:30 Breakfast & Free Time - They will sometimes ask for a tv show so I'll oblige after they eat as I'm still waking up and need to clean up dishes. I would love to set up a kids dishwashing station to put them to work! It will be in our next house for sure. I'll usually feed the baby and putter around gathering up whatever stuff we need to get started.
10-11:30 Snack and reading: Right now we are using a mix of things as I see what works best. On deck we have All About Reading Level 1 for Gabster & Explode the Code. She loves doing workbooks, so that makes my life easy. She's a bit further along than level one in AAR, but the review is good and we're doing two lessons at a time. Towards the end it will all be new, so we'll do just one lesson a day. We alternate, so she does Explode the Code T/Th to reinforce. AAR is nice in that it involves some manipulation of letters with tiles. I can involve soon to be 4 Lil Bit nto the activities. I set her up with a dry erase board and she occupies herself practicing writing and pointing out letters she knows. She helps big sister with cutting and pasting too, so fun for all.
After AAR or ETC, we do Five in a Row. This is our try at unit studies. At first, I was underwhelmed. It's pitched to be an all encompassing curriculum, but it is absolutely not. It is a wonderful way to incorporate social studies and science for young learners though, using literature as the "spine" of the lessons. So again, this a great tool to involve Lili, while being able to ask Gabster lots of deeper questions to expand on things. We're starting with Katy in the Big Snow. It is a awesome book and chock full of things to draw from. I'm obsessed with Pinterest as there's so much out there. Tomorrow, we're drawing a big "map to Grandmas" imagining we're Katy, plowing through the snow unearthing all the buildings on the way. That will lead us into talking about community helpers, directions using a compass, addition with measuring snow, etc. So much fun! We'll spend 2 weeks per book.
12-12:30 Lunch
1 - 3 - Lil Bit takes a nap (thank God for that!), and Gabster and I do math. We are using Singapore Math for the main curriculum and it's a good fit so far. It is very easy for me as a teacher to direct and Gabster just loves math period so it's a breeze. We also use Life of Fred. It's a funny little series of a books that takes students all the way to calculus with the same character Fred. It doesn't offer enough practice in my opinion, but it's a nice change and brings math to real life situations. We do math for about 30 to 45 minutes depending on how much I have to stop with Eli. I'm thinking of adding in computer time at this point too, so a fun app or game that reinforces math.
3-5 Snack, free time and dinner prep - Gabster is spent at this point, so we're done! Lili is up and they go off for adventures. She usually does some art too and likes to write a story with what she draws, but it's really all whatever she wants to do.
It's working so well. I'm so happy. If we have to run out and do errands, we just pick up where we left off later. I love that this can really be done in whatever way we want. During all this time, Eli takes a nap in the Boba carrier, gets to play with food in the highchair and nurses on demand. He's cruising so I'm always keeping an eye out as he's super fast!
Oddly enough, my days seem to be easier? It's as if this has tripped my brain to be more focused on maximizing all my time so I can be fully present during lessons. Perhaps it's just what I've needed all along to really make staying at home work for me. I sort of fell into the stay at home mom role, and up until now I've always felt I needed to be "doing" something other than just managing the house and kids. This speaks to my inner geek, and I get so excited for the next day's activities. Life is good.
Friday, January 24, 2014
We are homeschooling. What?!
If you know me, you know that I've approached parenting with a natural lean from the beginning. I've breastfed all three of my children, used cloth diapers, birthed my last two at home in water and even had my placenta encapsulated. Every decision I've ever made, in regard to them, I've felt 100 % happy with. That is, until the day came that my oldest was to begin public school.
It felt wrong. So wrong. But, it was what you did. At the appropriate age off she would go to learn and grow among peers her age. I enjoyed public school for the most part, doing well and continuing on to college. But this little girl is not anything like me socially. Let us start with preschool.
We found a half-day program when she was 3. She enjoyed it, and had wonderful teachers. The next year when she moved up to the 4 year old class however, a rather stern teacher was in charge. She had very negative aura veiled in positive comments that just rubbed me the wrong way. I went with it though, just because the rest of the staff was great. Big mistake. Huge. I sat in on several classes and in one instance this woman was threatening a 2 year old right next to my daughter. My daughter went into herself so deeply that I don't know that we'll ever be able to undo that damage. She was terrified of upsetting this woman, so much that she made herself sick in class (with me in the room to see it). She internalizes to this day every correction her classmates receive and she stresses about it all day long. She's visibly anxious each morning and complains of tummy issues often. She's even anxious now in fun situations, afraid to make the wrong choice from the prize box, or which bear to choose at the store.
I thought it would get better. She had nearly 2 more years at home after we took her out of preschool. She's the oldest one in the class. But 6 months in and while she was no longer crying every morning, she often talked about how she wishes her friends would make better choices and how she really didn't want to go. It pained me every day to know how stressed she was. At only 6, it just didn't feel right. Maybe she needed more time? I just didn't know.
Well, we're moving in April and she can no longer go to her current school. I love it because it is year round so she gets a nice 3 week break every 9 weeks to just be a kid and relax. Her teacher is great, as is the administration. It is everything I could ask for in a school. A traditional schedule in her new school though would mean 9 straight months of stress. Once school gets more rigorous, how would she cope? The squeaky wheel gets the grease. So if she makes OK grades, and does everything the teacher ever tells her, how would she get the help she might need? Would she even be able to tell me she's struggling? She's so stressed about doing the right thing all the time.
I can't do it. Not when I could give her better, give her a chance to be all that she could be without fear and anxiety.
When asked if she wanted to do this, school at home, she quickly said no. Surprised, I thought fine, maybe I had it all wrong. But later in the sweetest little voice on the brink of tears, she asked if she could change her mind. She asked "What will my teacher say if I don't come to school? Will she be mad?" Again, this sweet spirit just wants to make everyone happy and do what she's supposed to do. I told her of course it was fine and she said softly as I said goodnight, "I want to learn with my sister." Well, you got it baby girl :)
So, today was her last day in public school. We are homeschooling and I'm beyond excited. I love to learn, have always dreamed of being a teacher, and the chance to do it all over again with my babies is heaven on Earth. It's going to be hard. Really hard. I provide daycare so there will be 5 kids here under 6 (2 under 2!). But it will be crazy fun at the same time and with the support of family, dinner will get made, lessons will be learned, and the house will not fall apart.
It felt wrong. So wrong. But, it was what you did. At the appropriate age off she would go to learn and grow among peers her age. I enjoyed public school for the most part, doing well and continuing on to college. But this little girl is not anything like me socially. Let us start with preschool.
We found a half-day program when she was 3. She enjoyed it, and had wonderful teachers. The next year when she moved up to the 4 year old class however, a rather stern teacher was in charge. She had very negative aura veiled in positive comments that just rubbed me the wrong way. I went with it though, just because the rest of the staff was great. Big mistake. Huge. I sat in on several classes and in one instance this woman was threatening a 2 year old right next to my daughter. My daughter went into herself so deeply that I don't know that we'll ever be able to undo that damage. She was terrified of upsetting this woman, so much that she made herself sick in class (with me in the room to see it). She internalizes to this day every correction her classmates receive and she stresses about it all day long. She's visibly anxious each morning and complains of tummy issues often. She's even anxious now in fun situations, afraid to make the wrong choice from the prize box, or which bear to choose at the store.
I thought it would get better. She had nearly 2 more years at home after we took her out of preschool. She's the oldest one in the class. But 6 months in and while she was no longer crying every morning, she often talked about how she wishes her friends would make better choices and how she really didn't want to go. It pained me every day to know how stressed she was. At only 6, it just didn't feel right. Maybe she needed more time? I just didn't know.
Well, we're moving in April and she can no longer go to her current school. I love it because it is year round so she gets a nice 3 week break every 9 weeks to just be a kid and relax. Her teacher is great, as is the administration. It is everything I could ask for in a school. A traditional schedule in her new school though would mean 9 straight months of stress. Once school gets more rigorous, how would she cope? The squeaky wheel gets the grease. So if she makes OK grades, and does everything the teacher ever tells her, how would she get the help she might need? Would she even be able to tell me she's struggling? She's so stressed about doing the right thing all the time.
I can't do it. Not when I could give her better, give her a chance to be all that she could be without fear and anxiety.
When asked if she wanted to do this, school at home, she quickly said no. Surprised, I thought fine, maybe I had it all wrong. But later in the sweetest little voice on the brink of tears, she asked if she could change her mind. She asked "What will my teacher say if I don't come to school? Will she be mad?" Again, this sweet spirit just wants to make everyone happy and do what she's supposed to do. I told her of course it was fine and she said softly as I said goodnight, "I want to learn with my sister." Well, you got it baby girl :)
So, today was her last day in public school. We are homeschooling and I'm beyond excited. I love to learn, have always dreamed of being a teacher, and the chance to do it all over again with my babies is heaven on Earth. It's going to be hard. Really hard. I provide daycare so there will be 5 kids here under 6 (2 under 2!). But it will be crazy fun at the same time and with the support of family, dinner will get made, lessons will be learned, and the house will not fall apart.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)